Monday, April 26, 2010

Baby Milestones

This is my bright eyed baby girl! (she might look a little crossed eyed in this picture but i love her anyway!)

Playing with my first toy (this only lasted about 7 minutes before she was fully over it and upset no one was picking her up.)

Baby's first real bath! Amazingly, she LOVED it, at night if shes really fussy and crying and we just cant settle her, we put her in the bath and she is quiet right away. she loves it and just lays there so still and looking around. works everytime!

Baby's first picnic in the park with family. Notice Amelia's face... I dont think she was thrilled she had to share the attention with another baby. Not to mention the fact that in this picture, Jessi is the one who is holding the baby.


Baby's bellybutton stump fell off when grandma and grandpa were over.

Newborn Baby 0 months old!

I bought these little stick on numbers that go from 0-12 to mark milestones for baby or just to document what she looked like each month of her first year. I didnt mean to take these with Gus Gus in them but she jumped up there and tried to steal the spotlight. But when I went back and looked at them, I decided I would try to do all of them with Gus to show how big Harlow gets compared to Gus each month.

Saturday, April 24, 2010


Who knew I'd love being a mommy so much. Sure there are times when I just cant wait for Pete to get home from work so he can quiet her fussyness so that I can take a bathroom break, shower break, food break, sanity break, whatever. But then when I do, I feel guilty. and when I sit and eat and watch him hold her, I want to be holding her. I'm a crazy mess.

That was probably the fastest 3 weeks of my life. And she has already changed SO much!
First she lost her little bellybutton stump.
That meant she got to take her first real bath (so cute! she loves bathtime)
and she went through her first little growth spurt. she was eating like every hour for a few days.
Her eyes are open more
she makes cute little noises now instead of just cries.
she can follow our face with her eyes.
she opens her eyes when she hears our voices.
and she has finally decided that its ok to keep the pacifier in her mouth. (yes, i am a pacifier mom. dont hate me. i only give it to her when shes really fussy or screaming, it seems to comfort her)
shes taken her first shopping outing with me to Forever 21 and Baby Gap. she loved it, she really must be my kid. by loved, i mean she slept the whole time. haha. better than crying though right?
she loves to sleep in her car seat. the car puts her to sleep. but i think she has a 6th sense for when we pull into the garage, she wakes right up!
but she doesnt love being put in her carseat.
she is a peeing and pooping machine! no sooner have I cleaned a pee diaper, 5 minutes later I'm cleaning a poopie diaper. I guess I should embrace it and look at it this way, it must means shes getting enough to eat and shes healthy.

I came across a few things that I read online through friends and I thought I'd share them because I loved them so much.

"I traded eyeliner for dark circles, salon haircuts for ponytails, designer jeans for sweat pants, long showers for hairy legs, late nights out for early mornings, designer purses for diaper bags, and I wouldnt change a thing back because I LOVE MY BABY!"


I came across this while i was pregnant and really loved reading it, but today a friend sent it to me and i re-read it. This time i saw it in a totally different light. Thank you Gina for the great reminder!

In a week, we are packing up and moving to Washington for the summer. Pete's job is taking us to the Tacoma/Seattle area. Usually I stay behind and work but with a new baby this summer, we thought it was better that I came too. Before baby was born it seemed like it would be a piece of cake to take a baby on a 14 hour road trip to washington. NOW! FREAKING OUT! There is seriously so much stuff to pack and no time to do it. I made Pete promise to stay home on Sunday so he could watch her while I packed up and much as I could in one afternoon. At least its not a permanent move but still, i'm not a light traveler and neither is baby! I think we are a little crazy for thinking we could do this. its not going to be a piece of cake!

uh oh, baby is awake! I'll upload pictures later.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Today we went to re-try Baby Harlow's newborn pictures with Stephanie Ryan. And today was a success! So much better than our last attempt. Stephanie is great and so patient. I recommend her to everyone! Check out a picture she posted today. Can't wait to see the rest!

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

more pictures... sorry!

On Saturday we had Stephanie Ryan come over to take some newborn pictures of Harlow, except baby wasnt really cooperating. Instead of sleeping the whole time like we wanted, she was wide awake and fussy for 2 hours! Stephanie was great though and offered to try another day. Hopefully this Thursday goes much smoother. Dont let this picture fool you, she must have just blinked. haha.
Terra came over and met baby Harlow too. We had to spend some time trying to talk her into holding the baby but she finally did it, and she did good too.
And Whitney was home visiting from Virginia, yeah! good timing Whitney.

Tuesday through Sunday, Pete's Dad, Brent, and stepmom, Rhonda, came to stay with us. I'm so mad at myself, these are the only 2 pictures i got of them with the baby the whole time they were here. They were both a HUGE help. Rhonda was awesome and offered to stay downstairs with the baby at night so that Pete and I could get some sleep. She just brought the baby to us when she needed to nurse. And we got it down to where she would go to bed at about midnight and feed at about 5am and not again until about 7-7:30am. It was so nice to have them here and all of their help. Not to mention, Brent and Nick drove Buddah all the way to Sacramento to see and eye specialist. I'm sad they are gone. But I think Pete and I feel way more comfortable taking care of baby now.

Monday, April 12, 2010

I Can't Stop Taking Pictures of Her!

My Brother came home this weekend to meet the baby

watching TV together

Saturday, April 10, 2010

One Week Old

Baby Harlow is
1 week old today!
Daddy and Harlow
She looks so sweet when she sleeps

First family photo
She already looks so different from the day she was born
We tried to get her professional newborn pictures done today but she wasn't cooperating very well. she was really fussy and wouldn't fall asleep. we got a couple of good ones but the photographer said she would come back another day and try again.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

She's Finally Here!

Harlow Emi Hafen
Born on April 3, 2010
at 7:52 a.m.
6 lbs. 14 oz.
20 - 1/4 inches
Harlow Emi Hafen is finally here, and only 7 days late!

On Friday April 2, 2010 Pete and I went to Clovis Community Hospital after my Dr. told me she had scheduled for me to be induced. I was definetly nervous to be induced. You can never really know how you body will react to a medication. I didnt like the idea of being given a medication to force my body to do something that it should do naturally but I was also SO ready to have this little baby out already!

We got to the Hospital at 6pm and checked in and was given a room almost immediately. It took them a couple of hours to get everything ready to go before they finally gave me the pitocin. By 8pm they gave me my first dose and almost immediatley I was contracting. I did think that I was already contracting on my own before we even got to the hospital but they definetly werent consistent. After a couple of hours the pain got a little more intense. but not something I couldnt handle. My parents came to visit and so did Pete's mom and family. Ali, Meridith and Andrea also came down to see me and wait it out in the waiting room for awhile. They are crazy! I dont think I would have stayed for as long as they did. It was a long wait.

Finally I was starting to dilate and make some real progress. But thats when my contractions got really intense and I asked for an epidural. Once that was done things went a little more smoothly and with a little more speed. When I was about 5 cm dilated they decided to help speed things along by breaking my water. But the next couple of hours were slow to progress. It took me almost 4 hours to go from 6-7cm. During this time the nurse kept coming in to check on the baby's heart rate. She finally told us that it looked like the baby's heart rate dropped everytime that I had a contraction. They thought that maybe the issue was that the baby was on the umbilical cord and when I contracted, it put too much pressure on it. The baby's heart rate recovered each time the contractions stopped but there was an intense 4 minutes when the heart rate didnt pick back up and stayed under 100. This made things a little more scary for us and for the doctors. They eventually tried to pump warm water back into me so that it could take the pressure off of the umbilical cord, but I dont think that it worked as well as they were hoping for.

So finally after hours or waiting and no progress happening, the Doctor came in and discussed our options. One we could wait it out and keep trying to dilate to 10cm with no gaurantee that we would actually get there and then have to go to a c-section last minute or two, we could just go with a c-section now and ensure that the baby was safe and that I was safe. We chose option 2 only because I really felt like something worse could happen the longer we waited and I would rather be safer than sorry later.

They had the epidural guy come back in, it was different one from the first time because of the shift change in the middle of the night. Because I had already had an epidural and some other sort of medicine for the back labor (Yes, back labor, like everything you hear about it, is true. its NOT fun!) The epidural seemed to do something funny to my left side. They think that it was slightly more to my left than my right side because all through the labor process I couldnt feel my left leg as much as my right leg. there was a huge difference. I could wiggle all my toes and move my legs myself on the right side, but on the left leg it was like dead to the world. This created a problem for the epidural guy who wanted to make sure I was ready to go into a c-section and not be able to feel any pain. WELL... he finally decided that I shouldnt go into the OR with some much feeling on my right side and that they should remove the epidural and instead put in a Spinal.

They prepped me and got ready to take me to the OR and put the spinal in. In this process Pete had to wait outside of the OR until they were ready to deliver. I'm hugely afraid of needles and by this time this was like the 5th one of the night and the 2nd one in my back. I was very emotional about the well being of the baby and the fact that I was going to have emergency surgery. It was all a little overwhelming and I really felt like I was going to be sick but it never happened. The nurses in the OR were awesome at telling me exactly what was going to happen and when it was happening. When it was time for the guy to put in the Spinal he prepped me on the effects and what it would feel like. He said I would be numb from the chest down, that FREAKED me out, and so I asked him if I would be able to still feel my arms and hands and be able to use them, he said yes. He also told me that most people who have a spinal before a C-Section say that it feels like they arent breathing because you are so numb from the chest down that you cant feel the rise and fall or your chest or the reaction your body has when you breathe. So he gave me the spinal and almost immediatley i felt the numbing in my body and had to have the nurses hold me on the table so that I didnt fall since I couldnt control my body anymore.

It was really scary because just like he said, he said it would feel like I wasnt breathing. and it really did feel like that, I was freaking out, i really felt like i couldnt breathe. But he had me keep looking at the monitor to see my heart rate and show me that it was staying stable. He said that if I could talk to them that meant that I was breathing and to keep talking to them. At first I could and then slowly it felt like I couldnt get words out of my mouth anymore and I couldnt feel a single part of my body. I could hear everything going on around me but couldnt keep my eyes open or feel anything, I couldnt squeeze the Doctors hand when he asked me to and then all of a sudden, the Nurses were yelling for a doctor to get in and somthing about respitory dificulty and it was like all fo the Nurses turned into ants and started scurrying around so fast and yelling. Finally they had Pete come in and sit down by my head. He kept talking me to me and i could hear him but couldnt answer him. I felt like i was outside of my body and had no control over it anymore. The epidural guy kept asking me if I just wanted to be put out for the whole thing, but that was one answer i could answer, i kept shaking my head. I was DONE with drugs! i didnt want anymore ever again.

the c-section seriously happened so fast. I could hear the Doctor say, time of incision 7:50, time of delivery 7:52 and then it was literally over. I could hear the baby cry immediately which was a huge relief. Pete went and cut the cord and came back. I could hear the Doctors cleaning her up and fixing me up and finally they brought her over to me. That was the first time through the whole operation that I forced my eyes open. They held her next to my head, she was perfect! and she had her eyes open so wide.

After the c-section my body was doing a let down from all of the medication and I was shaking uncontrollably. Finally when it got a little better, they brought me back to recover and I finally got to hold her. I'm sad that my first reaction to holding her was that I was too scared because I was so shaky I didnt want to drop her, but i'm so glad I got to hold her! I'd been waiting for so long to do that and to see her! She's really here! finally!

Though this delivery is nothing like i expected it to be and it didnt nearly go as smoothly as i had hoped, i am so overwhelmed with how glad that i am that she is here. FINALLY! it was worth every pain imaginable because now I have her.


Friday, April 2, 2010

She's Late, She's Late, She's Late For a Very Important Date!

So today marks the day that our baby is officially 6 days LATE!

Doesn't this kid know that her mother doesn't wait for anything! This has been a true test of patience for me. I am probably the most impatient person you'll meet. I like things done on time and done right NOW! Nothing can wait once the thought has crossed my mind. So when a Dr. gives you a Due Date, in my mind she better be early or on time!

It never even entered my mind that she would ever be late, and 6 days late at that!

On Wednesday we went to the Dr. and I was still dilated 1-1/2 cm (the same for the last 3 weeks). The Dr. ran a few tests to check the baby's heart rate and my fluids to make sure everything was going well still. It was, everything was normal. So I didn't feel good about inducing just yet. I told the Dr. I would wait until Friday, come see her again and then go from there.

That same day I was having some INTENSE contractions. I actually had a few that were really painful and they got down to where they were 7 minutes apart. But eventually they turned into 40 min. apart and then an hour apart and then totally stopped.

Thursday... Not a thing happened. I barely had any contractions!

Today (Friday) we went to see the Dr. She had decided we should try inducing and I agree. I'm done being pregnant and I want this baby out, she's had her time, its not like she needs more days to grow or develop. Any way she comes out now is fine with me! I am still a little weirded out by being induced. I mean its drugs that forces your body to do something that usually nature does for you. But hey, I'm ready to get the job done!


We'll finally get to meet our little baby either late tonight or sometime tomorrow! I'm so excited! And a little nervous. Hospital, meds, needles, Dr.'s - none of those things usually agree with me or my anxiety very well. I get overwhelmed easily so I'm hoping everything goes smoothly. wish us luck!

hopefully my next post will be of baby pictures of baby Hafen!